"you're beautiful."
"thanks."
"why don't you understand what i'm saying? you're beautiful."
"because girls tell me it all the time."
"yeah, but they don't mean it like i do."
"yeah?"
"your face is beautiful, i'll give you that. sad puppy eyes, birds-in-flight lips, rocker-sloppy floppy hair. but your heart --"
"oh god."
"No, let me finish. your heart is so much more. you could fit the world inside there and feel it ache. that's what your pulse is. it's not blood, no ventricle contraction or atrium expansion, it's love. it's the ache of the world in your chest. that's why you're beautiful."
"why does it hurt so much?"
"because love hurts. and that's why we love. to hurt for others."
"to hurt for, or to just hurt others?"
"both."
"i don't want this."
"nobody does. everybody does."
"my heart isn't mine anymore, it's --"
"-- everybody else's. i know."
"what's wrong with me?"
"you're more beautiful than anyone in the world, that's what's wrong with you."
"that's a problem?"
"the biggest problem you could have."
"but i can't be."
"but you are."
"how can you say that?"
"because i mean it."
"how can you mean that? what have i done that's so beautiful?"
"because you're the one who showed me the world in all its pain and hunger, and still finds it beautiful."
"thanks."
"why don't you understand what i'm saying? you're beautiful."
"because girls tell me it all the time."
"yeah, but they don't mean it like i do."
"yeah?"
"your face is beautiful, i'll give you that. sad puppy eyes, birds-in-flight lips, rocker-sloppy floppy hair. but your heart --"
"oh god."
"No, let me finish. your heart is so much more. you could fit the world inside there and feel it ache. that's what your pulse is. it's not blood, no ventricle contraction or atrium expansion, it's love. it's the ache of the world in your chest. that's why you're beautiful."
"why does it hurt so much?"
"because love hurts. and that's why we love. to hurt for others."
"to hurt for, or to just hurt others?"
"both."
"i don't want this."
"nobody does. everybody does."
"my heart isn't mine anymore, it's --"
"-- everybody else's. i know."
"what's wrong with me?"
"you're more beautiful than anyone in the world, that's what's wrong with you."
"that's a problem?"
"the biggest problem you could have."
"but i can't be."
"but you are."
"how can you say that?"
"because i mean it."
"how can you mean that? what have i done that's so beautiful?"
"because you're the one who showed me the world in all its pain and hunger, and still finds it beautiful."
Es ist vielleicht.. im.. im Leben kann einer der härtesten Rückschläge sein, dass wenn man mit jemand, mit dem man sehr, sehr viel Zeit verbracht hat und von dem man geglaubt hat, dass er einem was bedeutet.. dass wenn irgendwann der Moment kommt, wo's drauf ankommt und wo man sagt: "Hey, hier bin ich, jetzt ist es, jetzt gehts mir nicht so gut, hier bin ich" Und dann ist er nicht mehr da und man hat immer geglaubt, dass man vielleicht für den Anderen was Besonderes ist und irgendwann merkt man: Ok.. , vielleicht war das nur die Hoffnung und vielleicht war es nur der Wunsch, dass man dem anderen so viel bedeutet.. und dann merkt man, dass es nicht so ist und dann tut es vielleicht, sehr, sehr weh.
Wie soll ein Mensch das ertragen?
Mh, was soll ich sagen? Ich kann's selbst kaum fassen, wie gut ich doch in diese Woche eingestiegen bin. Die Mühen in der letzten Ferienwoche an meinem Praktikumsbericht haben sich doch allemal gelohnt. :)
